Toby StansellThere’s an old saying fathers tell their daughters when they are of dating age: “Watch how your boyfriend treats his mother because that is how he is going to treat his wife.” When I am evaluating managers, I apply something similar. I am not that interested in how those managers treat the leaders to whom they report; I am more interested in how they treat those who work for them. Do they serve their team members? Do they encourage and develop them? Do they invest in them? In a workplace culture that applies these principles across the board, everyone has a chance to excel because they know their ideas will be heard and that hard work in the best interests of all will be appreciated by all.
I might carry the title of CEO, but when I take the parking place furthest from the front door and climb the stairs instead of taking the elevator, these simple routines are a symbolic way to regularly remind me that no one in our organization is more important than another…and I can use the exercise! We’re here to serve each other and to accomplish a greater good, not to get caught up in titles and corner offices.
Walt Bettinger, the CEO of Charles Schwab, offers a personal lesson that illustrates why this topic is so important to me. Bettinger had maintained a 4.0 average all the way through college and wanted to graduate with a perfect GPA, but he then encountered a final exam in a business strategy course his senior year that threw him for a loop. He had felt fully ready and had studied for hours, confident he could apply memorized formulas. When the teacher handed out the exam, it was a single piece of paper. The side of the exam facing up was blank, and when students were instructed to turn it over, the back was blank as well. The professor said, “I’ve taught you everything I can teach you about business in the last ten weeks, but the most important message, the most important question, is this: What’s the name of the lady who cleans this building?” Bettinger had no idea. It was the only test Bettinger ever failed. He said it made a powerful impact on him and that he deserved the B he received. Bettinger recalls, “Her name was Dottie, and I didn’t know Dottie. I’d seen her, but I’d never taken the time to ask her name. I’ve tried to know every Dottie I’ve worked with ever since.”
It’s a powerful lesson and a humbling one. I have tried to make sure I know the Dotties in my life. Don’t pay any attention to the zip codes where people live, the cars they drive, or the jobs they hold. Those are not the measure of a person. Treat all with genuine respect. You never know where the best advice will come from or who will teach you the most important lessons. Knowing the people I work alongside helps me see that every individual and every role within the organization has value, and that allows me to know where I can turn when I need data, information, and insightful perspectives. If I’ve done my part in helping shape the optimal culture for achieving excellence, we are a body of people where team members are not afraid to say, “No,” when they believe it’s in the best interests of the organization to avoid a particular direction or even what appears on the surface to be an opportunity. The authentic leader humbly accepts the word “No” from any level within the organization as long as that “No” is backed by sound logic or a proposed alternative course of action that fulfills a higher priority.
Think about how you wish to be treated by others. Don’t we all want to be treated with respect? Be human! In those rare instances when showing kindness to others gets you burned or allows someone to take advantage of you, it’s okay. Let it go. When you value and encourage people, you always gain more than you lose. And when you value people, they learn to value one another, creating a camaraderie that all can draw upon when facing demanding workloads or difficult circumstances.
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